Flashes of the night came back to me like icy bokeh images. Lights. Faces. Snippets of conversation.
Why did I do this to myself?
Every single night since Jed had left.
Well if you could call it leaving.
Leaving implied you were going somewhere else but with death you didn’t really go anywhere else did you?
You simply ceased to exist.
I wondered if perhaps I was already dead too; figuratively at least. I didn’t have much left to go on with… or for.
Maybe tonight would be the last.